went out with zhen, shan and quek despite those assignments. my toe is recovering but then hor.. that zhen stepped on my toe again.. haha...but ok lah... just say out to make her guilty.. i don't have to drag my leg to walk le.. then my comp is ok but not the printer.. Zz...

so long never go out with them le.. finally man.. haha... should say that the four of us still never change huh... quek still so self-consious.. kept looking at the mirror.. haha... zhen ok lah.. become so NOISY.. haha.. wrong medicine today.. shan no need say lah.. what to change.. lolz... we went to tao payoh and ate pasta mania... creamy chicken! yum yum... still craving for it although i ate it just now.. erm.. ok, abit too kua zhang.. haha.. then we went to safra toa payoh for a ktv session.. the serivce not that bad. cheap somemore..

after the ktv session, we went to bishan. as usual, we were so crazy in the mrt. haha.. went to take neoprints...

here goes...




then.... we walked around.. taufi.. having his pre-sale album.. not buying.. =X then saw zhen's mum, bro and weilin. weilin joined us for the rest of the program liao.. haha... went to coffee bean, sat down chat chat, crapping and their stupid cold riddles.. haha... then they played around with my phone.. took pics.. all took by quek quek.. haha..

here goes...
multi shots...



trying to act xi nu ai le.. haha... haizz.. i am so fat... actually got more pics de.. but ex to send mms to the email leh.. so.. too bad... then we stayed there until people 'chased' us out. bleah.

then walk walk again and look for bday bear.. the meiji chocos.. don't have mine leh... haha... then... 10pm.. so early rite... went home.... walked home with quek and we had a chat again..hee... oh.. M sms me and asked me out... will go bah cos so long never see liao and he understood what i meant so no harm... but not so soon.. so many assignments to do.. haha...

ok, i enjoyed myself.. better than staying at home and do those stupid stuff.. but no matter what.. still gotta do it sooner or later.. haizz.. so sick... nvm... thats all for today...

hapPi neW yR to all... =)



♥11:24 PM..Love
comm skills is driving me crazy.... when the hell can i finish those stupid assignments?? haizz... and this stupid semester was shortened until i dont know what to say... do they have to rush us students like mad? so depressing to go for lecture and they started telling you that when is the mid sem, when is the class test and whatever shit. i really hated sch... THIS MUCH!!! i see no point and no road to it.

laughter is the best antidote for stress. i have been laughing and smiling but still, it is not enough. i have been turning my antidote to food... haizz.. getting fatter and fatter.. but heck, maybe it is better to return to my old form? i still miss alot of food.. anyone wanna go food hunting with me?

-----------
yesterday night i finally sat down and listened to the news. and i then realised that the tsunami was so bad. i knew it causes damages, but i didnt know it is THAT MUCH... it is heartbreaking to see the news nowadays. haiz.. and my donations of $2 is definitely not enough... but one gd news, my indo friends and their family are alright.. =)

2004 is a bad year..

condolences to those affected.

♥8:45 AM..Love
Life is unpredictable.

To sherlyn: be strong.

♥6:00 PM..Love
To me...
Everything will be alright
Tomorrow will be fine...

again, the same post.
shall delicate this song to myself again.
love this song to bits.

by Mayday
終結孤單 Key: C
　　　　　C 　　　　　　Dm
約你你說不來　來了你又不High 　　　　　　
F 　　G 　　　　　　C
大家開開心心出來玩　你只埋頭吃飯 　　　　　
C 　　　　　　Dm
如果你的孤單　只是你的習慣 　　　　　　
F 　　G 　　　　　　C
一直把你自己鎖起來　實在太不應該
C 　　　　　　　Dm
心情好　心情壞　怎麼開始怎麼辦
F 　　　　　 C
你有的不爽　讓我來分擔
C 　　　　　　　　　 Dm
Everything will be alright　
Tomorrow will be fine
F 　　　　　　　　　C
太陽依然燦爛　Hey　地球繼續轉
C 　　　　　　　　　 Dm
Everything will be alright　
Tomorrow will be fine
F 　　　　　　 C
有我的陪伴　你再也不孤單 (一起終結孤單) 　　　　　　
C 　　　　　　Dm
衛冕者接受挑戰　難免也會失敗 　　　　　　
F 　　G 　　　　　　　C
人生雖然像一場比賽　還是要保持樂觀 　　　　　　
C 　　　　　　　Dm
請你把頭抬起來　幫你把勇氣加滿 　　　　　　
F 　　 G 　　　　　　　　　C
有我這樣完美的朋友　High不High　當然很High



♥8:54 PM..Love
i long for happiness...
i wish i can be myself...
but things dont go our way...
i felt being ignored...
or am i too sensitive?
or is it that our friendship ends here?
or is it that you are too busy to entertain me?
or is it me that i have changed?
i dont know..


♥7:25 PM..Love
haizz.. this week, suay suay and suay. mood swings and everything came all at the same time. just before the beginning of new year and i had a memorable christmas eve... -_-"

went to sch early in the morning to post my comm skills online. because today is the due date and my comp is spoilt(but ok for this moment). haizz... then, reached sch carpark and got this idiot car. it didnt see me and i didnt see it. his wheel rolled over my right foot and my foot was stuck underneath. damn, i didnt know how to react it and i was so stunned. went to sch with kangkong, i think he was shocked to hear me saying i cant get my foot out. then he saw my foot stuck there and ask the driver to drove backwards. and yah, the wheel rolled back my foot again. imagine how it pains? ok lah, it was numb. haizz.. and there goes my new URS slippers. so ex and it was spoilt by that car. argh... and i was telling yali whether the shop got sell one side or not. and the driver move backwards liao then drove off. haizz.. i didnt see the plate number somemore, and everyone is scolding me stupid. haizz.. how i know.. it is not a normal day thingy mah.. how i know my reaction so slow..

then, kangkong help me up the stairs and he went for lesson cos he was late. and i crawled all the way back to business sch. and the pain came, damn painful, pain until numb. pain until my tears kept dropping. a red, swollen foot with abit of blood. but luckily, i made it to the lab. haizz.. then i don't know who to tell, so i called my mum's workplace and i couldnt get through. then called home, got scolded by bro. haizz.. then yali pei me go see doc, thanks ger! got an injection and then i was referred to CGH A&E. bro brought me there. and of course, on the way there, i kena more scolding.. so yup, went there, from here to there, then there to here, took x-ray, and the doc said that i got fractured my toe abit and abit of bone chips. but he said it will be fine cos not all the toes. heng ah, if not got cast then sianz. then doc said don't walk too much and he gave me some painkillers and one week mc and appointment.

then went home, bro and my mum kept saying i stupid. haizz.. (actually yah, i find myself stupid too =X) my mum said my bro very worried cos i told him wrongly that is my leg got rolled over by car... -_-" but yah, can see that he is worried and alot of my friends sent their regards to me. thanks for the concern! i am alright now, got some bruises and yah, my toe is still in pain, i just need some rest.

but actually... come to think of it, wanna bang me bang properly lah, once and for all. then no need study. haizz.. make me in such a pain. and now i realised how is it like to be knocked over by a car or got run over by a car. damn painful one lor. so if one day, if that happen to me again, i make sure i die. i am not afraid of death but pain. yes, i am being unfair to everyone who cares about me. but seriously, if i am fated to live, i will live. yes, i have always know how fragile a life can be ever since after my last almost fatal asthma attack. but, i disagreed that my life is precious.

bro whine up some dishes and it was so delicious. but i miss out the gathering with shan, quek, zhen, guan rong and jiahao.. haizz... not in a condition to walk and my mum dont allow me to go out. haizz.. last minute like that. so sorry that i cant turn up.

anyway....

mErRy xMaS to all! =)

for whatever reasons god may have for keeping me in this world,
i thank god once again for letting me escaped from death twice.
from this point of my life, i will start to pray for myself too.

♥1:52 AM..Love
so tired.
so stressed up.
someone please help me.

spilt personality.
i have proved something. the surrounding and environment that you are in makes a difference. but i am determined. i will not be affected and be influenced. me is me. and i am not gonna to change.

i think i am becoming a nuisance to you. i shall not disturb you until you allow me to.

♥10:59 PM..Love
haizz.. two brothers went fishing without me! bleah.... if tomorrow class is not at 9, i also wanna go..... wasted man.. nvm, next time. sianzz...

and yes! bro gonna whine up some nice dishes during xmas eve! yeah... i love his cooking! seriously how many guys can cook nowadays ah... lolz... he said he wanna do stuffed chicken and that makes me laugh like mad.. lolz.. nvm.. shall wait and see wat he cook. felt like eating unagi leh.. haizz.. just think of it, saliva drooling liao.. haha...

♥11:58 PM..Love
haizz.. i can never and ever be a stock broker. too many conditions and under such stressful environment, i shall say, byeeeEEe to it... wahahaha... whatever.. i am insane once again.

i think i have seen all kinds of people, from everywhere, except outside singapore. wahaha... haizz... i am not the worst, and either, am i the best. some things are not within my control. but i try to make everything possible. it takes two hands to clap. i need friends. it has been such a long time since i have a talk to you all. but ok, everyone is busy and stressed up including me... wahahaha....

but anyway... projects are piling.... lalala....

to junting: SIAO... lolz...

♥1:36 PM..Love
now in sch library using the computer. nothing to do. waiting for yali and ally. haizz... quick leh.. faster dismiss... lolz...

i regretted what i put in my electives. sianzz.. and i am lazy to go and look for tutor to change again. forget it man. if i dun choose those, i also dunno wat to choose le. no point wasting my time to think abt what i wanna to be next time. haizz.. told my bro tht i wanna be stockbroker.. but he somehow pour cold water. said i never read newspaper, how i know abt the world affairs and the price and everything. haizz... i know.. wat he said got a point. and from what he told me, i am having a second thought.

then i put something tht will disgust everyone. i dunno why. but somehow tht elective, no matter who i have told, people will just say tht it is boring, and they will try to encourage me... but seriously, i think i make a wrong move again. and i doubt there are people choosing it. HAIZz... somehow i felt tht no matter what i choose is wrong. i hate accounts. and i will never like it anymore. i am so sick of it. i regretted choosing this course, too late. just hope that everything went well...

sch without frenz is boring.

somehow, something is forcing and pushing me. what is it? i dont know.

help.





♥4:04 PM..Love
went kbox these few days... go until i donno what to sing liao. haha... ans i dont like marine parade kbox. the room is damn small lor and the tv is so near to us. haizz.. scared we cant see the words. haha...

anyway.. tomorrow gonna be dragged up by my mum to go temple.. ZzZ... haizz... jialat... not enough sleep.... and after that, gonna go wilson's house for house warming.. ok lah, more to play playstation2 session. haha.. although i will be the one to sit down and see them play.

haizz.. havent do tutorials. shit.

time will heal everything.

♥1:57 AM..Love
at times, things do change.
it is just a matter of whether it is getting better or worse.
but when you think it has worsen, it may not be.

at least, you still remember us.
remember the times we had together...
joys and sorrows. we are together.
the importance of us; for you.

just wanna let you know,
no matter what happens,
your status in me will never change.
never will it shift.

you two are important to me.
many, many things.
i wanna say to you all.
but more than words can speak my mind.
time may drift us apart,
but hearts remain as one.

that is what close friends are for.

forever there for you.
friends forever.


... pig, gd luck for your concert k... =P

♥8:01 AM..Love
go to sch for lesson and go home... hated this routine. have been dragging for a week and i am still doing it. guess i will never like this course. hate the modules and everything. projects are piling. damn sianzz... even zhen told me she don't wanna go sch. imagine tht?? i never expect zhen to say tht.

had a chat with him. clear up some stuff and we are ok. hope he just dont keep asking me the same things and i will in return will not avoid him. wahhahaahaa..

and nowadays ah... people kept telling me i am getting lamer... DID I??? i didnt k... lolz.. just that sometimes i don't think we need to be serious. and laming does not require a person to think before he or she talks. wahaha... what a lesson on laming...

i have a feeling that this friday i have to come back to school for comm skills. our class is so far back behind others. haizz... plans are going to change again.

♥10:48 AM..Love
went to see a doctor.. having a bad cramp. hope i will feel better by tomorrow...

yesterday concert was nice. a success! my bro and his gf went to support me! haha.. but eh.. i heard my bro slept throught the concert. .... bth. nvm, guys don't know how to appreciate music. lalala...

some photos taken by my new phone-E600C(yes.... i bought the phone). but too bad... no port. so i have to send to email through mms then save it to my comp. abit sad rite.. haizz.. nvm... i love my phone. =)


sunflower! given by my bro's gf


isabelle and me


ally, anna and me... bth..ally trying to act cute again.. lolz...
♥8:52 AM..Love
haizz.. sch so sianzz... just finished my cds. haizz. the class is like so omg. ok, i don't know what to say about it but the feeling is not good. but anyway, manage to keep my eyes wide open just now. kinda surprise after tutor had talked so much about history.. now i am sleepy. *yawn* ok, whatever...

brothers are having holidays and they are hanging on to the PC every night. my stupid idea to download Maplestory. i thought they dl is for me to play, but in the end... sch started, and they are the ones happliy playing. stil say go play lah.. how to play when a person is using??? dont make sense. and ok, i admit that sch labs are the best when no projects are here yet. i can use it now.

finally pay had came. but school started, don't feel anything at all. kinda sianzz of it. wanna go out, but everyone's timetable clashes, wanna watch polar express but did not show in bugis. damn. i wanna enjoy myself. but it is kinda difficult.

maybe from next week i don't have to go back school for lesson on every fri as it is online so only piano lesson...

haizz... my class... what is there to say when good friends are not with me? all of my classmates seems to be paired up already. don't feel like getting in between of anyone and i don't feel very comfortable with anyone. although my class is ok... the problem only lies with me. yes, me and my stupid character. i am not one who take initiative. yeap. swee choo is right.

maybe going down to get my phone tonight. now then i know i can purchase the phone with just an authorised letter and an ic. ok, fine.

tomorrow is the concert day. excited? i don't know, mixed feelings.
♥11:24 AM..Love
boring school. school got so much money to change new PCs, why not have more computer labs?? and i hate the computer. so irritating, no space to put notes in front of me. blame the mouse for being not long enough, blame the monitor for sitting so tall. basically, i hate everything. and damn, 8am lect tomorrow and 3hrs of comm skills. and after that that, rehearsal. i don't know how to pass time but yah, i need the time for myself.

i don't care whatever my mother said. by all means, i shall get my samsung E600C.

i am sick of everything.
♥7:19 PM..Love
had a quarrel with my mother. ok, the whole day. quarrelled 3 times and the bomb in me finally activated. and this time, she is being unreasonable. ok, is always her being unreasonable. and whatever it is, i shall not talk to her until she starts first as it is not my fault. if only i am capable now, at this very moment, i will have left the house. you said that this home is getting not becoming like a home. actually, you should get this right: it has NEVER been like a home.

i don't need you to support me now. or whatever it is, $20 per week had never been enough for me to survive. i don't need you as whenever i came home from choir or school, you are not around or you are sleeping. so great! less friction and i don't wish to face you every now and then.

after 9th of Dec, nothing matters.
♥5:27 PM..Love
sch reopening. damn.. everything just sucks.
♥1:09 AM..Love
taufik won. haizz.. nothing to say..

anyway.. yesterday i have cooked cream spaghetti and bolognese spag, campbell soup, corn flake cookies, blueberry muffins and salad. i took one whole day to cook them. slow ah.. haha.. but it was very delicious k.. haha.. of course not i say only lah.. hehe... but all the work tired me out.. so i can only cook once in a blue moon. haha..

some pics..



the corn flake cookies! luckily it didnt get burn... hehe..




blueberry muffins.. more to cup cakes right? haha..



the creamy spaghetti.. too much cheese.. haha..



bolognese spagehetti..



my fav campbell soup!!

i didnt manage to take a pic of my salad.. haizz.. brothers lah.. 'action' too fast. haha... but it was nice k.. with lemon, sasuage, prawns, crabmeat, eggs, tomato, onion and lettuce. very nice.. hehe...
♥9:33 AM..Love
today is cooking day.. i am staying at home to cook. haha... surprise? haha.. dunno whether will succeed or not. wahaha..

anyway, i am so broke. can the pay please come in?? haizz.. sianzz man.. imagine i go NTUC still need to keep calculate in my mind whether it is still within my ATM amount. shitty man. *shake head*

anyway.... bEsT wIsHes tO...

An-na (hehe.. anna u noe what i am trying to say rite.. =P)- 29th Nov
bRo 21st bDaY!-30th Nov
YanLiNg-1st Dec

*haPpI bDaY!! =)*
♥9:16 AM..Love